other than the washer, everything has been sorted out--I GOT A NEW FRIDGE TODAY! And if THAT wasn't exciting enough, it has a normal-sized freezer! Or well, more normal sized. I looked over at the big chest freezer & thought, "Oh, I bought that, & now have one I could use anyway..." but I'll still have use for it due to storing lots of meat & nonsense from Costco.. The thing IS, she bought one too big for the space under the sink where the old one was. She had decided she'd have the new one put under the stairs... exactly where the shelf with the oven, slow cooker, and microwave were. I wondered where I was supposed to put the shelf & plug those things in, & was less-than-pleased about that... but of course I'd much rather have a fridge than none at all. & a freezer, so now the person after me won't have to put with that.
Now there's a big hole under the stove. After the fridge guys left (one of them actually spoke some English), they sent up the I guess estate agent with a big extension cord. So I just have to figure out where to plug it in & keep the other kitchen appliances. I'm not sure if the space under the stove will be big enough, particularly with a shelf taking some space on either side. But it gives me more space to put... something. & I HAVE A FREAKING FRIDGE & FREEZER! AMAAAAAAAAAZING!
Now I just have to keep on Sue to make sure I can use the washer, & we'll be all set!
Oh, & today Dylan got the keycode lock everyone here has, instead of a LOCK & KEY, COME ON! When he asked about getting it changed, Anna was absolutely SHOCKED he had to use a lock & key!
Oh, last thing: because they know I can't eat... anything baked & delicious, work sang happy birthday to me & we all ate fruit & chocolate! Love that they did that, even though I will breakout b/c I decided, "it's for my bday, I'm having some orange slices!" Pollution is back to unhealthy anyway. I worked out last night, but tonight will do ONE short workout, then yoga stretching & I'm done.
Monday, February 19, 2018
Tuesday, February 13, 2018
The more things, change, the more they stay the same.
I've waffled on back to staying for the debt repayment. 65% paid off before next week's payment goes through, & 75% of my creditors have accepted deals. I feel like being over the halfway point &, by the time this contract is up in July, I'll be past 70% paid off hopefully (still waiting on Chase to accept deal on remaining $6,000). I just won't be able to leave with the strong chance I can't continue the program & get those all paid off. Also, there's that whole difficulty of the job thing: how to secure a full-time or sufficiently paying jobs by March/April but not being able to start full time until July. So right now I'm working on getting a part time editing/writing job lined up to make faster progress on those payments, get more of my student loans paid off, & get that extra $2000 or so in pension when I leave. Plus I'll feel less worried about the remote job timeline if I already have something I'm doing & can add to the resume, that is likewise ensuring I have SOME income.
Today of all days (as it's the day before a long weekend, the Lunar New Year), Sue got it into her head to start getting shit on my apartment straightened out. You see, despite EVERYONE BUT ME BEING & SPEAKING KOREAN, everything has been a series of misunderstandings via miscommunications!
For one thing, the estate agent never did go into my apartment-- I guess the building maintenance/security guy did, & she took his word for what he reported. When she put in a request for a new fridge, her boss ignored it because we're close to a college, so lots of students live in our building, & they all wanted new appliances. Needlessly. So he's drowning in requests that he's not going to fulfill. So he thought my fridge was one of THOSE.
On the stove & fridge as well, we have been waiting for delivery or repair guys we thought were coming, whereas my building was waiting on me to say, "Nope, everything is STILL broken! Time didn't fix it, weirdly," before doing anything.
Sue & Anna confirmed the plumber came & taped the pipe under the sink, though both said that's not supposed to be a permanent fix & someone SHOULD fix that as one would normally expect it to be done.
Sue said she was sorry, & estate agent will either go in today or come tomorrow. OH! And the estate agent couldn't order the fridge anyway because, not having been in my apartment, she didn't know the dimensions.
The unbelievable, continuing saga of my broken apartment.
Today of all days (as it's the day before a long weekend, the Lunar New Year), Sue got it into her head to start getting shit on my apartment straightened out. You see, despite EVERYONE BUT ME BEING & SPEAKING KOREAN, everything has been a series of misunderstandings via miscommunications!
For one thing, the estate agent never did go into my apartment-- I guess the building maintenance/security guy did, & she took his word for what he reported. When she put in a request for a new fridge, her boss ignored it because we're close to a college, so lots of students live in our building, & they all wanted new appliances. Needlessly. So he's drowning in requests that he's not going to fulfill. So he thought my fridge was one of THOSE.
On the stove & fridge as well, we have been waiting for delivery or repair guys we thought were coming, whereas my building was waiting on me to say, "Nope, everything is STILL broken! Time didn't fix it, weirdly," before doing anything.
Sue & Anna confirmed the plumber came & taped the pipe under the sink, though both said that's not supposed to be a permanent fix & someone SHOULD fix that as one would normally expect it to be done.
Sue said she was sorry, & estate agent will either go in today or come tomorrow. OH! And the estate agent couldn't order the fridge anyway because, not having been in my apartment, she didn't know the dimensions.
The unbelievable, continuing saga of my broken apartment.
Saturday, February 10, 2018
You've caught me in a good mood.
Honestly, I'm not even upset about my apartment & the fact that I can't really use a bit of it.
I was walking to Lotte Mart, which just wasn't as crowded as usual on a Saturday night, or maybe it was just my continuing & mysterious lack of anger & frustration. In any event, I was thinking about how all I can ever do is ruminate on the bad things here, of which there are SOOO many, but today I was able to acknowledge the good. Like the fact that crime is ridiculously low here. A friend posted about this the other night: she took a pic of a scooter parked outside her building just before midnight, with the keys still in the ignition & no locks or anything of the kind on it. I think it was still running, actually, because it was one of the ubiquitous, if not fucking reckless delivery drivers. No one will touch it or steal it, he has no reason to worry. If I go to cafe & have my computer with me, I can go to the bathroom & not ask anyone to watch it for me. I can use my phone to reserve a table because that, too, will not be touched. Were I to lose it, someone would try to get it back to me (as that taxi driver did a while back, for example). & despite my never-ending irritation & frustration with how blasted crowded & slow & illogical people here are, they are also incredibly kind & warm & welcoming. Like Chile, honestly, but more so.
Teaching here is another joy because, as I discussed with my family, the kids are taught respect of elders & discipline at such a young age. I use SMILEY & FROWNY FACES to keep my classes in line. A class that Dylan hated is, while I've only had 3 so far, putty in my hands. All I have to do is say, "Frowny face," & the ringleader very passionately insists NOOOOo, she definitely doesn't want those! I spent the rest of that class fulfilling requests to draw Pikachu or Chip & Dale (!!!) in their books, to their complete delight. Sean I've been teaching since he was in Phonics, & he's completely crazy about me. He taught this same class that saying, "Thank you," gets them extra smiley faces, & that my signature on their completed pages is something they really really want in their books. This is how I keep anyone under the age of 10 well-behaved & enamored of me. When I'm in the hallway & see even middle school or high school kids that I've never taught, they bow to me, & say, "Hello, teacher." One night I was walking home, & the sidewalk was narrow. A kid came from behind me & passed me (a rare occurrence anyway), & scared me. That kid turned around & bowed to me as he continued on his way
If you start regularly going to a restaurant or coffee shop, you'll get little "services," anything from free extra shots, free coffee, or free snacks & food. I was getting coffee from the shop close to work where the staff speaks good English, & are always delighted to us, when an old man who was leaving gave the owner a bunch of pistachio-stuffed rice cakes. So naturally she gave me some.
Hell, even the fact that I've been pregnant for 2 years to many Koreans means OLD PEOPLE have offered me their seat because they think I'm even a little pregnant (or maybe they think it's a lot, lol). But it's all of that that makes it less difficult to just detest the place as thoroughly as I often feel & say I do. While I avoid going out so as to prevent another fit of frustration, going outside pretty much always includes some sort of interaction that lets me smile @ people sometimes.
I was walking to Lotte Mart, which just wasn't as crowded as usual on a Saturday night, or maybe it was just my continuing & mysterious lack of anger & frustration. In any event, I was thinking about how all I can ever do is ruminate on the bad things here, of which there are SOOO many, but today I was able to acknowledge the good. Like the fact that crime is ridiculously low here. A friend posted about this the other night: she took a pic of a scooter parked outside her building just before midnight, with the keys still in the ignition & no locks or anything of the kind on it. I think it was still running, actually, because it was one of the ubiquitous, if not fucking reckless delivery drivers. No one will touch it or steal it, he has no reason to worry. If I go to cafe & have my computer with me, I can go to the bathroom & not ask anyone to watch it for me. I can use my phone to reserve a table because that, too, will not be touched. Were I to lose it, someone would try to get it back to me (as that taxi driver did a while back, for example). & despite my never-ending irritation & frustration with how blasted crowded & slow & illogical people here are, they are also incredibly kind & warm & welcoming. Like Chile, honestly, but more so.
Teaching here is another joy because, as I discussed with my family, the kids are taught respect of elders & discipline at such a young age. I use SMILEY & FROWNY FACES to keep my classes in line. A class that Dylan hated is, while I've only had 3 so far, putty in my hands. All I have to do is say, "Frowny face," & the ringleader very passionately insists NOOOOo, she definitely doesn't want those! I spent the rest of that class fulfilling requests to draw Pikachu or Chip & Dale (!!!) in their books, to their complete delight. Sean I've been teaching since he was in Phonics, & he's completely crazy about me. He taught this same class that saying, "Thank you," gets them extra smiley faces, & that my signature on their completed pages is something they really really want in their books. This is how I keep anyone under the age of 10 well-behaved & enamored of me. When I'm in the hallway & see even middle school or high school kids that I've never taught, they bow to me, & say, "Hello, teacher." One night I was walking home, & the sidewalk was narrow. A kid came from behind me & passed me (a rare occurrence anyway), & scared me. That kid turned around & bowed to me as he continued on his way
If you start regularly going to a restaurant or coffee shop, you'll get little "services," anything from free extra shots, free coffee, or free snacks & food. I was getting coffee from the shop close to work where the staff speaks good English, & are always delighted to us, when an old man who was leaving gave the owner a bunch of pistachio-stuffed rice cakes. So naturally she gave me some.
Hell, even the fact that I've been pregnant for 2 years to many Koreans means OLD PEOPLE have offered me their seat because they think I'm even a little pregnant (or maybe they think it's a lot, lol). But it's all of that that makes it less difficult to just detest the place as thoroughly as I often feel & say I do. While I avoid going out so as to prevent another fit of frustration, going outside pretty much always includes some sort of interaction that lets me smile @ people sometimes.
Thursday, February 8, 2018
The exhaustion plateau
Have I mentioned yet that the washer can now be added to the do-not-use list? I'm pretty sure I did last night.
Tonight I ended up walking home because it got above 10 degrees. I went to Lotte Mart because I want cheese & the grocery stores only sell weird, chemically-Korean cheese, & Gouda. For Christ's sake, Gouda just grabbed these motherfuckers! It's a good cheese, don't get me wrong, but when I go to Costco next month, MAN WILL I SHOVE ASIDE MEAT FOR SOME FUCKING CHEDDAR. It's not a thing here. Except for some shredded with Mozzarella. Anyway, on the way home & even more remarkably in Lotte Mart, I felt no anger or disgust. The little kids were cute, I was happy to know some of the customs & use them & appreciate them for being different but interesting & no trouble. I figure that I've been irritated & upset by everything so long that I think I actually exhausted my anger!
But I get home determined to do more on this course. I'm really behind on the coursework for teachers looking to move to remote jobs. These other teachers are all looking to get out of teaching, whereas I feel like I'm not done with the job itself, but am definitely done in Korea, in Asia, in really anywhere that ISN'T Western Europe, & I'm nowhere near ready to pull the trigger on that yet. So, I joined this course to help me get a job I'll like that can (PLEASE PLEASE PLEEEEASE UNIVERSE!) allow me to live, pay off that debt, & move forward with my plans.
But on the facebook page everyone's so motivated & enthusiastic, whereas I'm feeling overwhelmed when she posts the new week's work & I still haven't done last week's. I want to do writing but when I have to come up with topics, or pitch ideas, or write regularly about some nonsense & keep trying to find someone to publish it... I just can't. I have nothing to say. I'm exhausted & overwhelmed & stuck & feel trapped. I'd need to secure this job in about March or April when Sue will ask about my plans. & I CANNOT stay here, in this apartment. I have great coworkers & students but I have to leave Korea. But if I don't have that job soon (& 3 months is the most likely timeline), I also can't do full time 'til July, which again will be 2-3 months before my contract here ends. But if I don't have a job lined up when she asks? How can I say no when I need the money?
Jesus, teaching here was supposed to help SOLVE the money issue!
Tonight I ended up walking home because it got above 10 degrees. I went to Lotte Mart because I want cheese & the grocery stores only sell weird, chemically-Korean cheese, & Gouda. For Christ's sake, Gouda just grabbed these motherfuckers! It's a good cheese, don't get me wrong, but when I go to Costco next month, MAN WILL I SHOVE ASIDE MEAT FOR SOME FUCKING CHEDDAR. It's not a thing here. Except for some shredded with Mozzarella. Anyway, on the way home & even more remarkably in Lotte Mart, I felt no anger or disgust. The little kids were cute, I was happy to know some of the customs & use them & appreciate them for being different but interesting & no trouble. I figure that I've been irritated & upset by everything so long that I think I actually exhausted my anger!
But I get home determined to do more on this course. I'm really behind on the coursework for teachers looking to move to remote jobs. These other teachers are all looking to get out of teaching, whereas I feel like I'm not done with the job itself, but am definitely done in Korea, in Asia, in really anywhere that ISN'T Western Europe, & I'm nowhere near ready to pull the trigger on that yet. So, I joined this course to help me get a job I'll like that can (PLEASE PLEASE PLEEEEASE UNIVERSE!) allow me to live, pay off that debt, & move forward with my plans.
But on the facebook page everyone's so motivated & enthusiastic, whereas I'm feeling overwhelmed when she posts the new week's work & I still haven't done last week's. I want to do writing but when I have to come up with topics, or pitch ideas, or write regularly about some nonsense & keep trying to find someone to publish it... I just can't. I have nothing to say. I'm exhausted & overwhelmed & stuck & feel trapped. I'd need to secure this job in about March or April when Sue will ask about my plans. & I CANNOT stay here, in this apartment. I have great coworkers & students but I have to leave Korea. But if I don't have that job soon (& 3 months is the most likely timeline), I also can't do full time 'til July, which again will be 2-3 months before my contract here ends. But if I don't have a job lined up when she asks? How can I say no when I need the money?
Jesus, teaching here was supposed to help SOLVE the money issue!
Tuesday, February 6, 2018
It's not my habit to ignore the universe.
As silly as it would sound to some (well Mark mainly), I believe in signs. For example, when I was working on my TEFL certification, waiting for it to finish & wait until March or April to give my notice that I was leaving for Chile in June. The workload for the course had been picking up, & I'd thought, "God, if only I could just not have to come into work, & just concentrate on this." Later that same month, I was laid off. Unemployment pay & everything. To me, that was a sign I was on the right path, because exactly what I'd wanted to happen, had happened.
& I can't help but think Korea & the universe are likewise telling me I should leave.
It is a week after I notified the building that not only was my stove not working, but the fridge & sink, since the sink was leaking. When I told my boss Sue, she told me to leave my apartment's key code with the manager. Well, I left it with the security guard/door man guy. Who, as you may recall, I'm convinced is senile, because he couldn't figure out what to do with said information. & that day, the real estate agent called Sue to say that the building manager didn't seem to have the info.
So yesterday, after no more word on it nor progress, I asked Sue to check on the status. Apparently, the real estate agent, who I BELIEVE IS, never mind speaks, Korean, asked the building manager for the key to my apartment, but not the key CODE. So he was confused. & being Asian, he can't admit to that, so he has to save face & say I hadn't left anything. Indeed, I hadn't left a key-- I'd left a code to enter into the keypad. Since that isn't a key, but that was what she requested, no clarifications or questions were asked further by either party, & this concluded the whole matter in every Korean mind involved. My frequent offers today & last week to tell Sue the code so she could send it to the agent, merited literally no response, each & every time. So I have been unable to use my kitchen for a week. I have to wake up halfway through sleeping to take leftovers out of the freezer so I can microwave or cook them in the oven. I have to take my lunch containers out of the freezer as soon as I get home so they can thaw enough that I can scoop out lunch servings for the next day before bed, then put everything back into the freezer. I wash my dishes in the bathroom. In short, it's a massive inconvenience.
So: I can't breathe (woke up because my nose was stuffy & runny, plus sore throat), I can't use my kitchen, this is the 3rd time this winter I haven't been able to use the kitchen sink. The stove keeps shorting out the apartment, I needed to use my own money to buy a freezer. My heater also went berserk for a weekend. Some of my closest friends here are leaving Korea in March, including the glue of the group who hosts wine night. I hate the country, & developed food allergies & continue to by hypothyroid after 5 years or so of stability since coming here. I feel like everything is strongly pointing to leave, except for the whole host of other problems leaving brings, which are just as significant.
I'm going to start trimming the workouts down so I have more time in the evening for the remote working after teaching course, & can secure some job. If not, I don't see how I can leave. No, I just can't leave if I haven't. Or trim my workouts, honestly. I know I won't, & definitely didn't last night (Wednesday night). Then I look on the forum for remote work for teachers & they're all excited & motivated, whereas every day I'm falling further behind in the coursework (watching videos/interviews with people, doing research/soul searching on what jobs, found nothing on the job list she sent out, applying for the jobs I'm supposed to have found). & in any event, no job is going to include health care which means I can't live in the US. & I can't tolerate the rest of the world, except at least the rest of the world has health care options. I can't even say FML because it has been fucked in one way or another all along.
But hey! At least I can now say with certainty that the Korean plumber who came & looked but did nothing was right that a pipe in the back is the problem, because while I was able to do laundry 3 weeks ago, last night I looked up from what I was reading & saw my apartment flooding! I got to wring out the clothes that were in the washer after soaking the dirty clothes to stop the water from spreading throughout the apartment!
I'm beginning to think I just have faulty memory of words & appliances. I had this fucked up crazy idea that stoves were supposed to cook food, when it turns out that here, at least, their real purpose is to short out the whole apartment. The washing machine is meant to wash your floors with too much, not-entirely-clean-smelling water. The fridge, instead of keeping food cold, is actually just for decoration & making it look like every bit of tiny space is being used. & I thought the kitchen sink was supposed to let me clean dishes & drink when in actuality it's just there to freeze over the winter & annoy with the constant dripping which at least isn't flowing out of the duct tape or broken pipe in the back. Oh Korea! What a great, fully developed place with a fully-developed mindset!
& I can't help but think Korea & the universe are likewise telling me I should leave.
It is a week after I notified the building that not only was my stove not working, but the fridge & sink, since the sink was leaking. When I told my boss Sue, she told me to leave my apartment's key code with the manager. Well, I left it with the security guard/door man guy. Who, as you may recall, I'm convinced is senile, because he couldn't figure out what to do with said information. & that day, the real estate agent called Sue to say that the building manager didn't seem to have the info.
So yesterday, after no more word on it nor progress, I asked Sue to check on the status. Apparently, the real estate agent, who I BELIEVE IS, never mind speaks, Korean, asked the building manager for the key to my apartment, but not the key CODE. So he was confused. & being Asian, he can't admit to that, so he has to save face & say I hadn't left anything. Indeed, I hadn't left a key-- I'd left a code to enter into the keypad. Since that isn't a key, but that was what she requested, no clarifications or questions were asked further by either party, & this concluded the whole matter in every Korean mind involved. My frequent offers today & last week to tell Sue the code so she could send it to the agent, merited literally no response, each & every time. So I have been unable to use my kitchen for a week. I have to wake up halfway through sleeping to take leftovers out of the freezer so I can microwave or cook them in the oven. I have to take my lunch containers out of the freezer as soon as I get home so they can thaw enough that I can scoop out lunch servings for the next day before bed, then put everything back into the freezer. I wash my dishes in the bathroom. In short, it's a massive inconvenience.
So: I can't breathe (woke up because my nose was stuffy & runny, plus sore throat), I can't use my kitchen, this is the 3rd time this winter I haven't been able to use the kitchen sink. The stove keeps shorting out the apartment, I needed to use my own money to buy a freezer. My heater also went berserk for a weekend. Some of my closest friends here are leaving Korea in March, including the glue of the group who hosts wine night. I hate the country, & developed food allergies & continue to by hypothyroid after 5 years or so of stability since coming here. I feel like everything is strongly pointing to leave, except for the whole host of other problems leaving brings, which are just as significant.
I'm going to start trimming the workouts down so I have more time in the evening for the remote working after teaching course, & can secure some job. If not, I don't see how I can leave. No, I just can't leave if I haven't. Or trim my workouts, honestly. I know I won't, & definitely didn't last night (Wednesday night). Then I look on the forum for remote work for teachers & they're all excited & motivated, whereas every day I'm falling further behind in the coursework (watching videos/interviews with people, doing research/soul searching on what jobs, found nothing on the job list she sent out, applying for the jobs I'm supposed to have found). & in any event, no job is going to include health care which means I can't live in the US. & I can't tolerate the rest of the world, except at least the rest of the world has health care options. I can't even say FML because it has been fucked in one way or another all along.
But hey! At least I can now say with certainty that the Korean plumber who came & looked but did nothing was right that a pipe in the back is the problem, because while I was able to do laundry 3 weeks ago, last night I looked up from what I was reading & saw my apartment flooding! I got to wring out the clothes that were in the washer after soaking the dirty clothes to stop the water from spreading throughout the apartment!
I'm beginning to think I just have faulty memory of words & appliances. I had this fucked up crazy idea that stoves were supposed to cook food, when it turns out that here, at least, their real purpose is to short out the whole apartment. The washing machine is meant to wash your floors with too much, not-entirely-clean-smelling water. The fridge, instead of keeping food cold, is actually just for decoration & making it look like every bit of tiny space is being used. & I thought the kitchen sink was supposed to let me clean dishes & drink when in actuality it's just there to freeze over the winter & annoy with the constant dripping which at least isn't flowing out of the duct tape or broken pipe in the back. Oh Korea! What a great, fully developed place with a fully-developed mindset!
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