Well, shit.

Apparently you can't swear in Korean schools, which I found out today because this has not been a good week.

Dylan & I had to write dialogues for half of our classes for speech contests. I've never experienced a speech contest, so had no idea what to expect, & no real expectations were laid out. They hinted that they should be about 1 typed page, so I went with that.

This was not easy, because I have 3 classes that are very basic beginner level. How to create dialogue when they're still struggling with, "How are you?"

I was about halfway done when they said it can't be one script/class-- it should be 1 script/2 students. That now meant scrapping what I had done (a dialogue with 5 speaking parts) & trying to write 22 instead of 6-7. 22. In less than a week.

When I was finishing, I saw Dylan's, & that it was much shorter than mine. I checked with one of the teachers & yep, the lines needed to be much shorter & the length down by a good 10 lines or so.

That SHOULD have made it easier, & I think it did, EXCEPT for the 2 I had to do for the class I share with the head teacher, Anna. Because I'd cut from the original whole-class one & then trimmed dramatically from the other, they didn't make sense, & with 5 others that I still had to do for other classes, I just didn't notice until Anna came to ask about them. I was upset because I thought those were done, & I could now deal with the OTHER bullshit hanging over my head, including a 30-question quiz about Halloween for Monday. I had been running out of questions, honestly. Plus a new lesson plan I have to do for 2 classes in 2 days or something, plus... yeah. If only they could have distributed the workload from I-have-0-to-do, let-me-help to once again, there aren't enough hours in the day.

I took the scripts from Anna to fix, irritated, which then turned to quiet ranting as I discovered that I'd have to retype them because the files on my USB suddenly could not be opened on the 1 computer in the school that works & prints. Hence, my quiet swearing to myself that Anna mentioned today. In the end, she said she'd fix that class'. The rest of them apparently are fine, even the ones for the really lower level classes. & believe me, writing dialogue when you can't even use certain tenses because they don't know them, is not at all easy.

I was upset that I upset Anna by getting upset, upset that I couldn't get that script right, & upset that it all wasn't over. The kids have less than one month to memorize them, which I'm sure won't be enough for some.

It's hard because I don't want the kids to do badly, & I don't want to fail them. I want them to learn instead of just memorize without understanding, which is still the Asian way because that's the understanding of the Confucian way. & yet I have to stop thinking of this like real school. The kids will progress through books & levels that they are SO not ready for because it's the appearance of progress that matters, not actual progress. I was talking to Dylan about the Halloween quizzes because I haven't really taught any Halloween stuff, & neither had he, so how are they supposed to take quizzes? His response was, "Oh, it's going to be a disaster, but that's not on us. We just need to make the quizzes, whether the kids can do them is irrelevant."

All of this came after my trip to the bank, when I intended to send the money I'd sent to my original US bank account, only to find it hadn't been deposited because they closed it on me. The bank said it would get sent back to my Korean bank. I thought giving that a week would do it, but oh no: I had to fill out a form to request the official return of that money, & NOW it'll take a week to come back so we can send it on to my newly-opened, no fee bank account. SOOoooooo yeah, that happened as well. The one & only bright spot is that once again I was helped by the one Korean teller who speaks from what I can tell fluent English. He is able to do said transfers & be nice & is actually cute to boot, surprisingly enough. He has told me he'll call when the money is back, & that I should just come to him when I go there. Like I need to be told, that was my whole plan given that I don't need to worry about what google translate did to my request. So I have a bank account in the US again! Now I just need to get the money into it.

You know what?

I've been doing super with customer service, hell, I did super with going to the store on a Saturday in Korea, moving through the crowds, sometimes even slowing down/waiting when there was an old person plus whoever else in the aisle blocking my egress. When I tried logging into my bank account to transfer money I'd just sent over and it couldn't do it & I called, I was all calm. I was calm when I when the bank couldn't do anything for me on Tuesday last week. I was calm and cheerful when the banker transferred for me on Thursday. But that all went to hell in a hand basket when I found out the reason I couldn't log into my online bank account is because it was negative $8 for a while, so it was closed. And that's a permanent thing, so there's nothing that can be done, apparently. My money will be sent back. So I get to do it all AGAIN!!

The super unfortunate part of this is that I have to make a payment on a credit card by November 2nd or it goes to collections. This is also understandable, since I basically didn't get paid for one month, so couldn't transfer money over, and then when I DID get paid I had shit to buy, so couldn't transfer money over then because I used it all.

So I get how it happened. It's just that... how the hell do I make my payments now?! Korea doesn't even let you connect paypal to your expat banking account. Wire transfers to a US account are it. I was almost glad because I thought, hey, I'll just use Chase like everyone else in my family, & have a bank account for Chase Quickpay. But no. I can't, because the monthly minimum balance is like $100 so you're not charged $12/month for maintenance. And seeing as my bank account is now only used to transfer money to my credit card and student loan, I want every cent put toward those payments, not needing to keep the account warm. So even that monthly $12 isn't something I can necessarily guarantee will be there for them to charge.

This is how I feel about waking up early to go the bank.

It's fine; I can just get up early again and go to the bank to transfer money to my awesome family for the time being.  

But after that? I looked at credit unions, but you have to have blood ties or work somewhere to get them. Actually, ally bank has none of that stuff I think, so using a VPN I should be able to open an account there. I think. Who knows? What I DO know is that I just needed for stuff in the US to keep working since outside of the US nothing really does. Give me a break! Or something. It's not a problem to keep a minimum in there when that is your primary bank. But outside the US? You're SOL. 

What's that you say? You can't have your cake and eat it too? Honestly, is there really anyone who doesn't get that the littlest shit makes me go bat shit? That meme hell hath no fury like me when I'm slightly inconvenienced? Whoever created that CLEARLY knew me. But it's popular because other people feel the same way, so don't be rolling your eyes at how everything sets me off because PLENTY of other people are just the same.

You know, it's the little things that get me. Think of my temper as a paper cut, and stupid small things as lemon juice. 

Though really, not having a bank account isn't actually very small. That's kind of a big thing. 

Alright kids, we'll learn about the expat banking emergency fix together! Know that I'll update you once I have more information to beat my head against/beat into my keyboard.

I wonder...

I wonder, now that I have a credit/debit card I can use online, on public transport, & generally like a normal person, if I can switch a couple of my ongoing bills to my Korean account so I won’t have to keep on transferring money between accounts. I guess I will for most/all still, but it won’t hurt to look into it.

In case you didn’t know, my rosacea went berserk this past month. Besides what looks like pimples on my chin, I got the telltale redness on either side of my nose, & then just to really tip the scales, pink bumps under and on the side of my eyes (those last 2 are new). So of course the dermatologist said I have the classic symptoms. & while most people anywhere wonder about it, rosacea almost exclusively affects people of Northern European heritage with pale skin. Only a tiny number of people from other backgrounds get it. Hence, as rare as it is anyway, it’s VERY rare here, and my co-teachers here have been pretty mystified by it. I explained on Monday about my new diet restrictions & how I’m hoping it’ll help my skin, as well as an intro on the concept, & one teacher, Jessic,a said she’d been wondering who’d been hitting me, & was getting concerned!

Skin is doing better: I’m on day 6 of my days of deprivation diet: no coffee, no alcohol, peanut butter (oddly), nor spicy foods for my rosacea, & for the thyroid, no wheat & no dairy. Honestly, it’s the coffee that’s the hardest, especially with all the coffee places in Korea. & I’d love to have a baked treat—now that I’m back to doing Paleo, I crave sweets once/day. & because I’m not in the US, there are few gluten-free & dairy free options, except up in Seoul.

What really sucks is I can’t eat a damned thing that Sue makes anymore because wheat is hiding in practically everything: if it isn’t there in the from of gochujang (red chili paste), it’s used to thicken the curry, or it’s in the noodles or dumplings, & of course in soy sauce (I’m going to see if I can find Tamari on iherb, the alternative food shopping site here), so I brought my own stir free to eat while I look longingly at the deep-fried pork chops (considered a traditional Korean food staple) &, of all things, cream of broccoli soup the other day (COME ON!). I’m glad to say that the Gluten Free in Korea facebook group located a GF gochujang, which is great news b/c I love that salty, somewhat spicy paste! I just have to find the store closest to me that carries it.

I started the rosacea diet on Friday after seeing the dermatologist. I already knew about those dietary restrictions; it just hadn’t been so bad up to now. So I finally decided I’d better give it a try. Like I said, it’s improving, the little pink bumps around my eyes are almost gone, and the pimple-like eruptions on my chin are smoothing out, but I’m not sure if it’s primarily the antibiotic, the new skin care regimen, the diet, or a combo. A site recommended giving up the first items I’m giving up because they tend to be triggers for 10 days. I’m going to see how my skin handles coffee on day 11, alcohol a day or two after that, and see what exactly it is that pisses off my skin, or which combination.

I’m planning on remaining off gluten and dairy for… I’m thinking it’s going to have to finally be permanently, and just having it as a treat here and there. Honestly, I’m still not sure that the rosacea isn’t connected to wheat too… my autoimmune issue these days is laid at the feet of leaky gut, & not-surprisingly, an article I read just connected rosacea to it too. Go fooking figure.

Oh, I think I mentioned the new teacher, Dylan, started last week. Seems like a nice really guy. We were talking last week, & I was apologizing for not knowing what restaurants around us were good since eating out alone in Korea is pretty damned hard to accomplish, and he said, “Let’s be friends and go do that.” It was so straightforward & even a little ingenuous & sweet that I thought, that’s awesome, let’s, while the other half of me thought, maybe he’s a stalker? Lol. So far that isn’t the case. He’s the one who tipped me off about the English-speaking security guard, after all.

I still have Taiwan to post about; it’ll be short, except I’m probably wrong & will manage a novella. Until then kids.

Odds and Ends

I knew I had a few little things to report, nothing big though, and was trying to get it all together, when I realized I also have the trip to Taiwan to mention.

So, in order! First, all is well (except that I seem to have come down with some thankfully minor stomach thing), work is fine. I find that I go through money far faster than ever before… it could be because I’m more socially active, I guess, though what I’ve been realizing is that, among the other great things about ILS, I don’t think they were taking out any money for insurance, because I make a little more money than there, but a couple hundred less is deposited into my account, and the receipt of pay and deductions I receive from this place shows me exactly where that money goes, and it all adds up and makes sense. While we are cooked dinner by the owner here (well, an evening snack to me), there’s rarely much protein in the meals because meat is expensive, so I was in the habit of going to the Lotte Mart to buy their little packages of roasted pork, skin and fat and all. Largely because I work out at night and am less inclined to cook as well when I get home at 10-10:30. And of course, Sue the owner is right, meat is expensive, so I have been spending a bit more money on that, due to my knowing that there is no way I’m getting enough protein for the working out I do. Due to that and my huge hunger when I get home from work, I have some protein powder that I now keep at school and make a shake twice/day, which will hopefully help a lot more with protein consumption and hopefully help me eat less and finally (MAYBE?) trim off SOME fat. It’s just… how much? I decided way back in my 20s that I’d put on around 5-10 pounds because it helps hide lines and wrinkles. The other problem is that I did this whole heavy-duty dietary deprivation when I did P90X, & I find I’m less interested in working that hard at not eating and living in general. Especially as I noticed I was feeling bloated some evenings, and it appeared that coincided with when I ate a small bowl of cereal for dessert… wheat, that ongoing question mark. 

So I’m not eating wheat in the form of finished products. The thing IS, Asia is ground zero for cross-contamination. The idea that you should not use the same tongs you handled raw meat with is completely unheard of, so the idea that a little wheat used in some other dish being present is absolutely in NO WAY a thing or understood to be a problem. People think with all the rice they eat here (and they do eat a lot), there’s little or hardly any wheat here. Au contraire! Bakeries are EVERYWHERE here, and while you’d never likely guess it, all red kimchi has flour in it because it’s made from Korea’s red pepper paste, which is thickened with flour. So whenever there is red kimchi present or in something, if you have Celiac disease, there’s not a thing you can eat. Though there’s no WHERE you can safely eat either, what with using the same utensils and workspace and grease, etc., that cooked other things with wheat.

My stomach is ok but I’ve eaten very lightly this week due to its sensitivity before, so I’m aiming to keep eating as little as I have this week for the next several weeks. Here is hoping.

While I’m still seeing Aaron, I did, despite my knowing better, decide to give a new guy named Bill a chance. Things started off unconventionally enough when I received some texts at work which said, “Please I need to talk to somebody now.” When I got off work, I called. He’d had a flashback, because pretty much all the guys who are here seem to be military combat vets. After a few weeks of talking, he did what every blasted guy does: insists on seeing me when I have plans. Furthermore, he wanted to see me when I went up to Seoul for brunch, and his base is a good 1.5 hours south of my place. Meaning a 2-hour commute. I SOOooo didn’t want to. And I kept thinking of my rule that ANOTHER combat vet taught me in Chicago, namely, I don’t travel for guys. That’s kind of hard to do here, since military guys aren’t exactly treated like the adults you’d think they are, as they have nightly curfews, and if they wanted to stay off-base for a night or even after hours, they have to ask for leave. Plus, most guys are from the majority of America that has no public transportation, so the trains are buses are new enough to them, never mind adding a whole different language and alphabet into the mix. In short, if I am intent on repeating my mistakes from necessity, here in Korea I will have to go to them. (Note: the same vet who was my lesson on not traveling was I believe the same vet responsible for the rule about no more combat vets either.)

It was an extremely trying trip, punctuated with Bill suddenly not seeming sure he’d have enough time for me or not, so I had to wait around the train station by my place, waiting on his final decision. He said he’d have time, so onward I continued, cranky and despairing about my rule-breaking.

Sooo, long and short of it, his base is different from Aaron’s (or they’ve really cracked down on security since the exercises started up), so everything took much longer once I got there, from figuring out if I was at the right gate, to Bill not knowing how long it takes him to get to the gate from the barracks, to signing me in.

He was nice, just wish he knew… his way around the base, his way off the base… though at least once I was there us getting lost/not being able to find a cab to get to the restaurant he wanted to go to didn’t concern me in the least, since this was all his problem now.

Nice guy, but haven’t really heard from him since then. I really liked him, but I suppose it’s well enough, I just don’t need to get wrapped in a vet. I keep wondering if this is how my guys were when they got back? God there are just SOOO many of them that already have interpersonal issues and are starting to or already have PTSD. Sadly it looks like it’s going to be another generation’s turn to be a Jen or Claudia or Ruth to these guys, I just don’t have the wherewithal to figure out the inroads with them, and I don’t have the emotional capacity to break through their far fresher wounds.