The results are in!

& the lingering question I have is, how much Vitamin B is ENOUGH? Because I've been taking my supplements every day for many months, & thanks to Costco, I have beef at least once/day, and yet, this test says I'm STILL short on B6 & 12! I'm low on CoQ, tyrosine, plus some hormones or things that help with mitochondria, burning fat for energy, something that helps with detox, T4 for my thyroid, & yet yep, plenty of bad bacteria. So she took me off the pills for my skin since I'll now be a pill-popping maniac-- in addition to my vitamin B complex, 5HTP, selenium, and zinc, we're adding the CoQa with B6 & 12, & 4 pills 3 times/day for the gut bacteria. No alcohol (SIGH, & I have a Xmas party on Saturday), but also VERRRY limited-to-no caffeine, limited sugar (which is why I went with my craving and got a cafe mocha). Oh! & SOMEHOW I may not be getting enough FIBER? ALL I eat is lots of veggies with my meat, for chrissakes! So I'm taking fiber stuff too. The big relief? I was SURE I only had $100 left in my bank account (after getting a new winter coat that will actually help keep me warm, a new hat because the fun with 2 pom-poms got lost at a bakery), & a sweater because fuck it, I wanted to buy something fun! I don't get paid 'til the 13th, so we've a ways to go before that money comes in. But the ATM tells me I have $300! Don't know how, but VERRRRY relieved I have more than $20/week.

Anyway, the doctor thinks once this bacteria is cleared up, my skin will be, too. HA, my skin will not be deterred in its mission of sucking for as long I'm alive unless you throw pills at it! Plus, you know, stop eating like a human being. THEN it's much less grouchy. "Ruined Jen's life with fucking insane dietary restrictions? WELLL, my work here is done!"

& yet, yet AGAIN, I found out that the Xmas party, being thrown by a woman I've really only met twice, will have lots of paleo options! & for the dessert pot luck, someone asked about the diet restrictions to see if she could make something that works. & on top of that, I decided to go to the Xmas cookie exchange this year, I'm just not going to take any cookies... except for Rin's, who's also coming & making paleo cookies for my very own pain-giving ass! So SOME upshots. Plus this regimen for the gut is for 2 weeks (though she only gave me meds enough for 1 week, so I'll have to go back next week, because I'm in Korea so OF COURSE I WILL!).

A final note is that last week I brought my favorite middle school boys & the one girl some pumpkin pie (none of them have had it, nor of course turkey). I wanted to bring some in for Jessy, my fav middle school girls' class, & then Jennifer, their Korean teacher (who is great, btw), mentioned SHE'D never had pumpkin pie either. Why keep the remaining Costco pumpkin pie in my place when there are so many people deserving of tasting pumpkin pie? So here's hoping it thaws in around 4 hours. We'll see what they think!

Here's how the boys reacted, though this is mainly how I've now found that Korean kids react to aerosol whipped cream in general-- they can't quite get over the sound or concept.

Now I'm aggravated.

I decided this year I'd put up the window insulation (it's bubble wrap on one side) to see if it would help. It doesn't SAY which side is the one that should be on the window, but can't see how the bubble-side would be it. Windows are dry, so sprayed with water per instructions, and it is NOT STICKING. Because, of course it isn't, why the FUCK would it? Why would I buy something in this shitty hell hole & have it work??!!

I made the idiotic mistake of posting to expat women for advice. I deleted the post after the 3rd motherfucker told me to "spray the windows." FUCKING GOD DAMN YOU ALL TO THE KOREAN HELL OF STATING THE OBVIOUS, I FUCKING DID THAT.

Someone said tape the top. SURE! The top of the windows is covered in condensation & mold, it'll stick! ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY!

I'm just leaving the one window done, since I don't want this shit falling on me or my bed while I'm sleeping.

So, fuck sobriety. You know, I'm finding that yes, sobriety lost the battle today, but sobriety as a default and/or way of life is losing the war as well. If this is Europe too, I'm going to do what Jason did, hole up in the US, except unlike him, I won't be giving the bottle of sanity either.

Well let's just get this out there.

Honestly, my life changes little: it's eating in ways most people probably wouldn't even consider eating, working out, cooking, sleeping, & being @ work with great kids & coworkers & enjoying my job, just not the rest of my life so much. WHAT a switch!

But one great break in the routine this week... ok, there were a couple tiny things that are still news to you. FIRST, I took my sample to my doctor to check for SIBOs (Small Intestinal Bacterial Overgrowth), which is common for both people with Hashimoto's, & people with rosacea. Did you know it can lead to food sensitivities?? IMAGINE THAT! We'll know the week after this Tuesday.

Also, my friend Rin is getting kicked out of her apartment. Mainly because she's a slob. I can't honestly say I blame her landlords-- her housekeeping skills are college-dude-clean. Given that she has to be gone by Dec 1, I realized she wouldn't want to go to Costco. Seeing that the membership is less than 1/2 what I expected, I decided I'd just get my own. Naturally, my first inclination was to do this online. Which I TOTALLY managed in Korean, until it was time to pay. Can an expat buy a Costco membership online in Korea? HELLLLLL NO, not even if you did the King's Quest for your bank & spent 2 weeks downloading certificates & programs on your computer to get a FUCKING CREDIT CARD YOU CAN USE ONLINE. EVEN THEN, you cannot order your membership online. FORTUNATELY, I've been told the people @ the Costco I go to have English speakers, so Tuesday I'll get there early enough to do the paperwork & then get my meat & pistachio fix (my addiction to their salted pistachios, SALTED PEOPLE, YOU DON'T KNOW HOW RARE that is here!) fixed.

So there's that. Lastly, friends from Chicago, Shana & Josh, rock stars that they are, not only came to Korea, but made plans for us to meet so I could meet their 3 month old daughter.

Now. Josh & Shana are great people, so it's worth any sacrifice, really, to get to talk with them. But their daughter Sylven? A SWEET, ADORABLE ANGEL. I don't just say that because I found out Shana ACTUALLY reads my blog! Oh no. I've wanted a niece & Sylven fell under my Tyler-induced baby love spell. She is laid back, SOOOOO CUTE, & sweet & fun. I loved talking to that little angel & making her coo. I especially love doing that because since becoming an aunt, I got an eyeful of what being a parent is like, so whenever I can give the parents maybe a few minutes of not having to worry about their baby, I'm all about helping, The fact that I get to have fun with sweet baby angels who are RIDICULOUSLY BEAUTIFUL, is an extra extra bonus. So, between the awesomeness of Shana & Josh as company anyway, PLUS an ADORABLE baby that I'm smitten with, well, it's just win-win.

It's now Saturday night here. Tomorrow, I'm going back to Laura's for Thanksgiving dinner + her birthday dinner. Tonight was wine night, & before it I got a message from a girl I just met there a month ago whom I liked right away:

Hey I know you said you were a maybe for wine night tonight but really hoping you can make it!! It was really great talking to you last time so hoping to see you again tonight Unfortunately I can't make it for dinner tomorrow and I know lots of people are opting for that instead.

WHO sends awesome messages like this?? There are people who LIKE ME! It's fucking crazy & awesome. Mark, YOU'D even like this girl, so you know she isn't some crazed lunatic.

Tomorrow is a potluck. Thinking ahead, I volunteered to make gravy & pumpkin pie, because gravy's made with milk & flour, & pumpkin pie, I mean OBVIOUSLY. Milk is the ONE THING that my skin does NOT freak out over, but I still wanted to make a gravy I could slather shit in. Laura's not making stuffing (:-() but she is making green bean casserole WITH ALMOND FLOUR. She's likewise making pumpkin bread & almond chocolate chip cookies so *I* can eat this shit. People down here take my FUCKING RIDICULOUS FOOD ISSUES into consideration & cook around them, no problem, no complaint! I am continually stunned by the great, great people I meet abroad.

Speaking (previously) of my skin, I'm still not ready to go on record about my doctor, regular doctor mind you, giving me natural supplements that my skin FUCKING LOVES, but I will say that those prescriptions, plus oil cleansing plus my inhumanely restrictive diet plus rose water makes my skin fucking happy as hell. So, I've recovered from the grapefruit soju, & am sometimes amazed my skin looks THIS good.

Speaking of good, I'll close with what I overheard a student explaining that I nearly lost it over. I so wish I could have filmed it. My higher-level class were conferring to discuss the Speaking Contest. Charls (some American asshole actually spelled his name this way, which is another example of why I fear Americans coming to teach here), said with all the DRAMA of Korean students, "I am SANTA CLAUS. I am HANDSOME, sparkly, shiny, & CUTE!"

It has come to this.

Notice I don’t mean this is my actual PLAN, but I am currently investigating UAE as my next location after this contract. While I love my students and, excepting that idiot teacher Yuna, my school, the pollution here is taking its toll. We know my diet is maniacally restricted. But I probably haven’t mentioned that it is NORMAL for women in their 20s and early 30s to post about never-before-occurring skin conditions occurring here, like acne & eczema, nor the other common complaint among the same group, of women LOSING THEIR HAIR. That’s what the pollution does here. While I have to continue making more than enough money to live, it'd be SUPER GREAT to not be in a place where the above complaints aren't a constant stream while I'm battling my own health complaints here. Given the lack of alcohol & recognition of about half the world's population as actual humans, nevertheless, if I don't have to fight my skin while fighting other forms of insanity, that'd be GREEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAT.

Here's my skin on one bottle of grapefruit soju:

My skin doesn't react this way to other liquors. & I can't help but wonder if my skin would react this way to everything it does now minus the solids in the air here. It'd be worth it to have a less restrictive diet. Though one year in a country back in Medieval times? I'm wondering if the health vs. mental isn't about even.

On nights like this,

it doesn't feel like my diet's so restrictive.

Today was cooking day, for the week. Then, because when I woke up I saw that I left out a bag of frozen shrimp when going through the freezer last night for the ground beef for today, I realized I'd have to make them too.

I tried this recipe a couple weeks ago, & it was fantastic, until the coconut milk in the mashed potatoes & the veggies in the meat started to sour. So since then (& it had happened often before), I've started freezing the last 3 or so days' worth of lunch so it won't go bad. I didn't use the bacon I used last time on top, & the seasonings were different, but this week will be a repeat of my veggie-filled meatloaf plus mashed potatoes & steamed broccoli & cauliflower (since Lotte Mart out of NOWHERE had cauliflower again after a couple months. I was so happy when I saw it I grabbed 2 heads & walked through the store, no lie, continuously talking to them & calling them, "my precious.").

The difficulty with shrimp is it's ALWAYS cooked with lemon, because it tastes great together, but my skin hates citrus. Luckily a recipe mentioned white wine, & while it's hard to find good wine, & wine that isn't Chardonnay, I found an Argentinian Pinot Grigio or Blanc, & that was good enough for me.

So, lots of cooking done.

Other than that, in all the time I've not posted? Well not much.

I maybe mentioned that when I had knee discomfort the PT noticed my right quad is weaker than my left, so leg day is now a tear-inducing 1.5 hour workout, both legs, & then the right again. So Tues & Thurs are especially awful & taken up solely by the leg workout.

This weekend the burlesque group I'm in with Rin had a show down by the Air Force base Aaron used to work at; 70 people came, which isn't bad. Everything was (to me) falling apart because a girl I knew from wine night said she'd be in the show, then 2 weeks before, dropped out. That left 2 performers. Rin found a girl who does pole dancing, a former stripper from Canada, & Angela, who has been in Korea a long time, a very gregarious lady & a great MC. Honestly I could go into this whole weekend which had me PIIIIIIIIISSED & swearing this was my last show with the Suwon burlesque group, but it was only the one time @ the base, & I've got netflix to watch. There's another girl who helps do the stage stuff, Elizabeth, & she is FAAAAAR better than I because she was in theater for years, but she doesn't get dressed up as much as I, & isn't as comfortable as me in just sone clothes.

Aside from burlesque, to keep me from being bored, I've enrolled in 2 EdX college courses, one which I'll receive a certificate for & can put on my resume. I've also been talking more with a guy who WAS in Korea to expand his family's spas, but went back to Paris before we could meet, & SAYS he's still going to come back here, he's just super busy with work there. In Paris. Partying as well, poor thing. He keeps me entertained when he writes, & that's pretty much all I care about.

Otherwise, life is about as usual. I'm really excited to come home & NOT be in Asia for a week. Already know that whatever else, I'll be back in Chicago by the 27th, & Jason's going to plan on coming about then, & will have surprised the nephews, who are the biggest reasons I wanted/needed to visit home. But sweet JESUS do I have a shopping list! How much do electric blankets cost there? Because HERE, they're over $100. My feeling is, fuck that, I'm bringing a suitcase full of shit back.

Why come back when I still hate Korea & Asia? Because when I leave here, I'll receive $7500 from my pension, plus the $2000 severance. Each year is $2500 pension, so why leave with $5000 when I can leave with $2500? It SUCKS, but it'll help. Plus then I'll have paid off the credit card debt & can then start putting that money strictly toward college loans & MAYBE savings.

So, life goes along as usual here. Figured may as well throw in SOMETHING since it has been so long. I'll stop the double-right-leg workouts after Dec, so hopefully won't be so overwhelmed... except those college courses, & burlesque, & reading, &.... So. 'Til then!