Ok. Here's the situation.

Jerry always did call me a shameless hussy. It't time to act like one.

My friend Dani here joined a burlesque group. She was a ballet dancer and a stripper years ago. I've never seen her dance, and their group was going to some town I've certainly never heard of. She got a hotel room, & invited me to join. It was expensive (106,000 round trip), 2.5 hours away, and it turns out on the Sea of Japan (with what really sometimes looked like a pirate ship. There were fireworks that night over the water, too)

and has, I should have known, a military base. The hotel was great, she got the nicest room, so we had a view of the sea, 

a living room, a bathtub (no time to use, ) A HEATED TOILET SEAT WHICH IS THE BEST THING EVER, plus of course a bidet. The bar where they were performing, Tilt, was owned by a Korean American, which I discovered that night, relies on the best looking military base I've ever seen for business. He also DOES NOT make his burgers or fries with fucking sugar, which is an abomination unto God and everything on Earth. I ordered 2 burgers to start, which came out with cheese and bacon, fries, REAL dill pickles (they're usually all sweet here, because of course they are), fries AND onion rings. Later, the owner kept bringing us chicken wings and nachos. Finally, all that yoga and kindness to a stranger on a train before Aaron left is paying off! (Oh, did I mention he left Korea last Wednesday? I saw him the weekend before, and on my way back, I was sitting next to the doors when I heard some sound. I looked over to find an American soldier kneeling on the floor directly in front of the doors, sobbing. The Koreans all looked a bit uncomfortable. Part of me wanted to just stay out of it, but I was the only person on that train who spoke English I'm sure, and I couldn't NOT do something. God knows people have been kind to me when I was in distress. I asked him if something was wrong, and he told me he'd just found out his wife is cheating on him. God damn. What do you say to that? I got up, took his hand, stood him up, offered him my seat. He said no, so I moved him out of the doors and held him. The poor boy, and he was a boy, sobbed and squeezed me. My heart just broke for him. I talked to him, made him laugh a few times too, asked where he was going. He said his base was at Suwon. So I talked to him until Suwon. I asked if he wanted me to go with him, help him get to base, take him out for drinks because I had nowhere to be. He said no... and actually he needed Seryu, which was the stop before Suwon. He said he'd be fine going back the one stop. I should have just gotten off with him, but I wasn't sure if he wanted to be alone. His wife is home, and I guess he was talking to a friend who's going through a tough time & solider boy is trying to help this guy out from abroad, and that guy told him he & soldier's wife were sleeping together. I was heartbroken for him the rest of the day. I hope to God he got back ok, just one stop on the train but still, they can be confusing since lots of states don't have public transport, and he was so upset.) To add fucking awesomeness to the WHOLE deal, the owner gave us FREE food and drinks, unlimited, all night. That is ON TOP OF sending us a whole bottle of Bombay gin. Because the universe was SHOWING ME SOME SWEET SWEET LOVE. 

The group realized that they needed someone at the door to collect money. I was the only one there not performing, so I volunteered. I stood next to the stage, so I could still watch. The show was great. Dani was AMAZING, God damn could she move. The guys were very enthusiastic, lol, and bought the girls ever more drinks, lol. I got hit on by a drunk guy, who kept pointing to the back where all the guys are watching, saying, "See that guy?" Yeah dude. Totally. He asked my name, told me his was Marco, asked if i was performing, asked me why not. Wanted me to hangout with him next weekend, then asked my name again. "it's Jennifer, Marco." And of course he thought I was his age, 27. Another guy thought Dani & I were both 30. Heeey, kind of aging in a loop, literally, eh?

After the show, the girls were mingling, and there was a table of girls interested in doing burlesque. 1 of them was this gorgeous girl, and she kept also teling me I should perform. Ah yes, actually, I let her in with less money at the door that she said she'd pay back later, and she did, and we talked, she had demanded I perform, and said she was going to start screaming my name to get me up there. She never did, but she made me come dance with her a few times too. Kept telling me how beautiful I was, so a nice mutual admiration society.

The burlesque girls are great too. We all know I couldn't care less about people seeing me naked, and my vanity would love a bigger, live audience. And I still look good, if not as I did during P90X. BUT. We ALLLLL know I CANNOT dance, act, flirt with a bunch of people, strip seductively, none of that. One of the dancers doesn't actually strip, she just wore a 1 piece bathing suit covered in balloons people popped with sparklers. She said I don't have to do any dancing, etc, I can be a bored bitch if that's what I want. I still don't know if I could do that on an actual stage in front of lots of people. Yet. But what I COULD do to start is wear a little costume & be a "kitten," a person who cleans up the stage between performances & puts up props. They need one too, apparently. I was thinking French maid of course. Any other ideas? Stage names? Opinions? I'm really excited actually.