As silly as it would sound to some (well Mark mainly), I believe in signs. For example, when I was working on my TEFL certification, waiting for it to finish & wait until March or April to give my notice that I was leaving for Chile in June. The workload for the course had been picking up, & I'd thought, "God, if only I could just not have to come into work, & just concentrate on this." Later that same month, I was laid off. Unemployment pay & everything. To me, that was a sign I was on the right path, because exactly what I'd wanted to happen, had happened.
& I can't help but think Korea & the universe are likewise telling me I should leave.
It is a week after I notified the building that not only was my stove not working, but the fridge & sink, since the sink was leaking. When I told my boss Sue, she told me to leave my apartment's key code with the manager. Well, I left it with the security guard/door man guy. Who, as you may recall, I'm convinced is senile, because he couldn't figure out what to do with said information. & that day, the real estate agent called Sue to say that the building manager didn't seem to have the info.
So yesterday, after no more word on it nor progress, I asked Sue to check on the status. Apparently, the real estate agent, who I BELIEVE IS, never mind speaks, Korean, asked the building manager for the key to my apartment, but not the key CODE. So he was confused. & being Asian, he can't admit to that, so he has to save face & say I hadn't left anything. Indeed, I hadn't left a key-- I'd left a code to enter into the keypad. Since that isn't a key, but that was what she requested, no clarifications or questions were asked further by either party, & this concluded the whole matter in every Korean mind involved. My frequent offers today & last week to tell Sue the code so she could send it to the agent, merited literally no response, each & every time. So I have been unable to use my kitchen for a week. I have to wake up halfway through sleeping to take leftovers out of the freezer so I can microwave or cook them in the oven. I have to take my lunch containers out of the freezer as soon as I get home so they can thaw enough that I can scoop out lunch servings for the next day before bed, then put everything back into the freezer. I wash my dishes in the bathroom. In short, it's a massive inconvenience.
So: I can't breathe (woke up because my nose was stuffy & runny, plus sore throat), I can't use my kitchen, this is the 3rd time this winter I haven't been able to use the kitchen sink. The stove keeps shorting out the apartment, I needed to use my own money to buy a freezer. My heater also went berserk for a weekend. Some of my closest friends here are leaving Korea in March, including the glue of the group who hosts wine night. I hate the country, & developed food allergies & continue to by hypothyroid after 5 years or so of stability since coming here. I feel like everything is strongly pointing to leave, except for the whole host of other problems leaving brings, which are just as significant.
I'm going to start trimming the workouts down so I have more time in the evening for the remote working after teaching course, & can secure some job. If not, I don't see how I can leave. No, I just can't leave if I haven't. Or trim my workouts, honestly. I know I won't, & definitely didn't last night (Wednesday night). Then I look on the forum for remote work for teachers & they're all excited & motivated, whereas every day I'm falling further behind in the coursework (watching videos/interviews with people, doing research/soul searching on what jobs, found nothing on the job list she sent out, applying for the jobs I'm supposed to have found). & in any event, no job is going to include health care which means I can't live in the US. & I can't tolerate the rest of the world, except at least the rest of the world has health care options. I can't even say FML because it has been fucked in one way or another all along.
But hey! At least I can now say with certainty that the Korean plumber who came & looked but did nothing was right that a pipe in the back is the problem, because while I was able to do laundry 3 weeks ago, last night I looked up from what I was reading & saw my apartment flooding! I got to wring out the clothes that were in the washer after soaking the dirty clothes to stop the water from spreading throughout the apartment!
I'm beginning to think I just have faulty memory of words & appliances. I had this fucked up crazy idea that stoves were supposed to cook food, when it turns out that here, at least, their real purpose is to short out the whole apartment. The washing machine is meant to wash your floors with too much, not-entirely-clean-smelling water. The fridge, instead of keeping food cold, is actually just for decoration & making it look like every bit of tiny space is being used. & I thought the kitchen sink was supposed to let me clean dishes & drink when in actuality it's just there to freeze over the winter & annoy with the constant dripping which at least isn't flowing out of the duct tape or broken pipe in the back. Oh Korea! What a great, fully developed place with a fully-developed mindset!
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