Tuesday, April 26, 2016

So, about that whole not-boring life I’ve always wanted….

So yeah, I think my posts about my life thus far speak for themselves on that front. Most of them have been of the not-bored-but-bad type. Last week (I think?) I mentioned that I seemed to be dating someone. Unsurprisingly, but not exactly sadly, I can report that that no longer seems to be the case. Aaron, who as I said had nothing much to say anyway, had so little to say he didn’t even bother texting me “Hey” every night. In fact, I didn’t hear from him until I texted him Wednesday to see how he was, & he promised to call Thursday, which he did. Then, more boring nothingness was “discussed.” Friday I went out with a friend for drinks (and, as it turns out, had pupa soup, which I tried, REPEATEDLY, to post to facebook, but every attempt failed for reasons unknown),

 and texted Aaron re. the soup. No response. Saturday I wasn’t sure if we were at the point where it was understood I was going to see him, or we still had to discuss and confirm. Since I hadn’t heard from him & we hadn’t discussed/mentioned my coming on Thursday, I texted to see if he was up and enjoying the weather. Later in the afternoon, when I was feeling super depressed and needed to be around people (hence went up to Seoul to get the nuclear solutions of the previous post), I called, but it just rang out.

He did text me the usual, “Hey” on Sunday night, but I ignored it, so the uneventful barely-relationship had an uneventful end. So the timing was amazing when an incredible-looking guy (also on badoo) sent me a message. He is ridiculously hot. So, red flag number 1. He is VERY sweet and a little… bashful? Coy? Not sure what the word, but big old red flag #2. Because, super hot is super rare anywhere. In Asia, it’s practically nothing more than a mirage. But hot AND sweet? These are not qualities that can coexist in straight men.

Badoo’s pics are protected, so I can’t use what I’ve learned from the tv show Catfish to see if these are his photos, or there’s a model with a selfie addiction out on instagram or someplace. And interestingly, a la Catfish, dude lives in Korea but is home in Australia for two months, shares a room with people (so can’t skype), and has no other messaging apps on his phone (because it’s his work phone). Suffice it to say, those latter 2 in particular have pretty well convinced me that I am most definitely talking to some other guy, since I can never actually see him when we’re talking. He has sent me a few other pictures of when he’s just lying around, and those I could search for in google images, and got no hits. It’s the same guy as all the other pictures, so there’s that.

Being half-Portuguese (should this actually be him) means he has that European-guy thing down, including, we’re going to keep messaging each other every night until he comes back to Seoul and then we’ll “be together.” So it passes the time, though, again, not entirely pleasantly because a bit of this time is spent knowing this guy can’t be real, but if he were real WHY is this guy messaging ME. Because I’m pretty, but I’m not THAT pretty. Not this-guy pretty.



So, dear God, I believe that is all there is for you to know, with the Jen-of-old overzealousness for minutiae and detail. I’ll keep you updated on the 1.) trailing off of model boy before any meeting could actually take place, or 2.) his unmasking into the nice-guy-in-a-toad’s-body he really is. 

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